Just a Dream
Beep. Beep. Beep. The sound of the heart monitor sings its song as I open my eyes to a plain hospital room its walls painted pink to try and hide the sickness and pain that surrounds me. I don’t remember what happened. I only remember driving home from practice with my little sister Lizzie. We were arguing about something, I don’t remember. Where is Lizzie? I try and call out but, words seem to be impossible for my mouth feels like sandpaper. I go to press the call button that has been laid beside my bed. Yet there is no movement. Am I dreaming? This must be a bad dream. I need to wake up this is just a bad dream. MOVE! I yell at myself attempting to just move my hand. I can hear my heart monitor starting to speed up as I begin to panic. An alarm is sounded from my monitor. A nurse comes rushing into my room checking my IV and pulse telling me it’s going to be okay. Her voice is soft as she asks me a few questions. I try to the best to my abilities to answer mouthing the words.She comes over to the side of my bed and grabs my hand and asks me to squeeze. But, I can’t. I can’t do anything. I feel as though I am just a corpse. I am no longer alive. She looks at me once more and asks me if I remember what happened. I them motioned my lips the best I could to say no. She them said really calmly, ” You were in a car accident.” As soon as she said those words images began coming back to me. She tries to calm me down but, I can’t hear what she is saying to me. I was driving on Albany Lane when I went into an intersection. I looked at my phone for one second but, then a semi slammed into us. What have I done? No, this isn’t real. Where is Lizzie? Is she okay? I’m dreaming. It is just a dream. This can’t be real. I try and rationalize what happened. The nurse holds my hand tightly in hers. Then she asks if I want some water. I say yes and then she leaves the room. I lay there immobile mentally spiraling realizing what I have done. Wishing that I could just press rewind. I don’t want to be here. I want to be home with Lizzie and my mom. What have I done? When the nurse comes back I notice that mom is standing right behind her. She lightly knocks on the door and walks in saying that I have a visitor. My mom grabs the water that is in the nurses hand and gives it to me. The water drips from my lips and she takes her hand and wipes away the water from my mouth. I look at her face to see that she is crying. She looks at me and tells me that she is so happy that I’m alive. Her face is red and her eyes are blood shot she had been crying. I then look at her and lip Lizzie’s name. She looks at me and immediately breaks into tears. That’s when I knew. She’s gone. My little sister. I killed her.