Reckless and Ashamed

Ailene M

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You’ve entered your first real car, it’s time you show those around you that you are capable of driving. You’re in and ready to leave. You’re nervous so that’s fine because after all you had a good amount of sleep and a good amount of time on social media, right? You pull out the driveway and head to that restaurant with the best burgers in town, that’s your first decision. You get to eat to your hearts’ content but you fail to clean the grease off your hands. You place those greasy hands on your wheel and continue to the next destination, the mall. There you find yourself making a new friend. That friend gives you their Instagram username to chat with. As you drive once more, your wheel remains a bit slippery, but you choose to ignore it, meanwhile this friend LOVES to text. They keep texting and texting, and you find yourself replying to every last message. Nothing has happened yet, so you’re not concerned. You head on to the concession stand down the road, there you decide to buy a variety of snacks to eat. You want to go home to get a good nap in, so you decide to drive a bit over the speed limit. During this the wheel is still being slippery, the friend keeps texting back, you have your right hand digging for snacks, and most importantly you feel tired. You close your eyes for one millisecond and then … “Where am I?” … “What?” .… You come to find out that you have committed the ultimate thing you didn’t want most. You drove reckless and to make matters worse, you gave the grim reaper a chance to take yet another soul today. You now feel horrible, you feel numb, feel weak. You want to puke and you do so due to all the snacks that you had a chance to consume before the life of an innocent had been taken away. Sorry is not enough for you to try and console yourself from this shameful feeling. All you can feel is like you have been reckless and now you feel ashamed of yourself. “Forget all distractions and concentrate on your driving,” is what you feel should have been the first words you pushed into your brain when you stepped into that vehicle.