I killed my best friend

Natalie Christina C

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I killed my best friend on March 22, 2016. I did not wake up that morning with the intent to kill her, but I soon made the decision. Saturday at 10:46am I sent her a text, “Hey, wanna hang out?”. She replied with “of course!”. I sent another text, “omw”. I drove to her house and picked her up. We spent the day hanging out: driving around, sitting at a park, visiting friends, stuff like that. We had an amazing day— maybe it was that thought that jinxed us. She was supposed to be home at 9 pm so around 8:45 we headed to her house. While driving I heard a “ding”. That’s when I decided to murder my best friend. I didn’t make the conscious decision to kill her but by picking up that phone while operating that car, I inadvertently decided both of our fates. I checked my phone, just like I’ve always done, but this time, instead of seeing a message, I heard a loud crash then everything went black. I remember waking up upside down in the car to flashing lights. My best friend was no longer in the passenger seat. I crawled out of the vehicle where I was picked up, placed into a stretcher, then lifted into an ambulance. I tried to gather my thoughts but I couldn’t stay awake to process any of the information. I think of that day all the time. All the damn time. I often wonder, why not me? I’m the one who made the decision to check my phone. I’m the one who ended up rolling the car and throwing my best friend 15 feet into a field. Breaking three of her bones, gashing her leg, and snapping her neck; killing her almost instantly. I made the decision, but she suffered the consequences. I sealed her fate— that she never lived to see another day, and I secured my own— living the unbearable pain of knowing that I am responsible for my best friends death. I am not telling you this story for sympathy. I am not standing here trying to make myself feel better about it because, trust me, I will forever feel remorse for what I have done. I do not stand here trying to scare you. I stand here to honor my best friend. I tell you this story for her and all others who have died because of distracted driving. Do them the honor of driving safe. It is too late for them but it is not too late for you, or for your best friend. Do not drive distracted, keep your eyes on the road, wear your seat belt, and, please, drive safely.